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Funny Motherhood Quotes That Will Make Mom Laugh Out Loud

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Last Updated on January 16, 2024

Being a mom can be a tough job if you don’t have a good sense of humor. These funny motherhood quotes make it easy to laugh about the common problems all mother face.

Funny Motherhood Quotes

#1: “I used to have functioning brain cells, but I traded them in for children.”

A mom holding two kids with text reading I used to have functioning brain cells, but I traded them in for children.

#2: “I love cleaning up messes I didn’t make. So I became a Mom.” – Unknown

#3: “I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.” – Phyllis Diller

#4: “There are three ways to get something done: do it yourself, hire someone to do it, or ask your kids not to do it.” – Malcolm Kushner

Text on a white, blue and red background that reads There are three ways to get something done: do it yourself, hire someone to do it, or ask your kids not to do it.

#5: “Nothing is really lost until mom can’t find it.” – Unknown

#6: The quickest way for a parent to get a child’s attention is to sit down and look comfortable.” – Lane

a graphic of a cup of tea with text reading The quickest way for a parent to get a child's attention is to sit down and look comfortable#7: “Over the years I have learned that motherhood is much like an austere religious order, the joining of which obligates one to relinquish all claims to personal possessions.” – Nancy Stahl

#8: “Did you know, when kids go to bed, you can hear yourself think again? I sound fabulous.” – Paige Kellerman

#9: “When I raise my voice, my kids call it ‘yelling’ but I call it ‘motivational speaking’ for the selective hearing.”

a graphic of a man holding a megaphone on a yellow background with text reading When I raise my voice, my kids call it "yelling" but I call it "motivational speaking" for the selective hearing!

#10: “A vacation frequently means that the family goes away for a rest, accompanied by mother, who sees that the others get it.” – Marcelene Cox

#11: “Motherhood: Powered by love. Fueled by coffee. Sustained by wine.” – Unknown

#12: “Waking your kids up for school the first day after a break is almost as much fun as birthing them was.” – Jenny McCarthy

a blue background with text reading Waking your kids up for school the first day after break is almost as much fun as birthing them was.

#13: “Having kids makes you look stable to the people who thought you were crazy and crazy to the people who thought you were stable.” – Kelly Oxford

#14: “Dance like only your kid is watching. Cook like no one will scream they hate it. And sneeze like you won’t pee your pants.” – Kristin (@shriekhouse)

#15: “Motherhood is like Albania–you can’t trust the descriptions in the books, you have to go there.” – Marni Jackson

Funny Mom Gifts

Are you a mom with a sense of humor? Do you have a mom who likes to laugh? Check out these funny mom gifts.

Or, have your favorite funny motherhood quote printed on a t-shirt or mug at CafePress.

Other Posts To Cheer Up Moms

Corinne Schmitt

Corinne Schmitt

Hi, I'm Corinne! I'm the mom behind Wondermom Wannabe, helping busy moms simplify life with easy meals, fun family activities, and stress-free organization. As a mom of five, I know how overwhelming it can be—so I share practical, real-life tips to make things easier!

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